This Website is Unreal

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Give Us Your Time

Our confusing suite of unprofessional services caters to a diverse clientele, ranging from useless pages to downright absurd links.

Learn Nothing. Laugh Some.

Why absorb useful info when you can absorb sarcasm, snark, and an amusingly executed jab at that one recipe blog that writes 3,000 words before mentioning flour?

Clickbait Without the Regret.

We promise ridiculous headlines like “You Won’t Believe What This Tech Blog Did With a Sandwich”, but unlike the real internet, our disappointment is intentional.

Stay Uninformed, Hilariously.

Real news is depressing. Our version is fake, dumb, and lightly seasoned with existential dread. Much better for your mental health.

Judge Websites So You Don’t Have to Judge Yourself.

Mocking influencer bios and startup buzzwords may be among the heartiest form of deflection since binge-watching reality tv.

It’s Like the Internet, But Nearly Self-Aware.

We roast pop-ups, autoplay videos, and FAQ sections that answer nothing—basically, everything you hate, but with jokes.

Finally, a Website That’s Useless on Purpose.

Unlike most sites that waste your time accidentally, we do it artfully—with precision-engineered nonsense and lovingly handcrafted satire.

I laughed, I cried, I forgot why I came here. 10/10.

Bob Steiner

Sponsored Internet User

“My productivity dropped 80%, but my sarcasm level is at an all-time high.”

Waldo Warez

Formerly Employed

“I sent this site to my therapist. She doubled our sessions.”

Trent Finnagan

Diagnosed with Terminal Wit

Give Us Your Time

Why not? Have something better to do? Start here!

Tourist taking photo of a building

“Man Accidentally Reads Terms and Conditions, Ascends to Higher Plane”

  • Chic article
  • Fashionable to read
  • Tell your friends you were here
Windows of a building in Nuremberg, Germany

“Which Window Matches Your Personality? Take the Quiz No One Asked For”

  • A world of thought-provoking questions
  • Nobody else asks you these
  • Exclusive insights to new window designs that reflect your soul

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That’s a lotta zeros. This can’t be accurate.